Many books have been written about attempting to change oneself, and I have read more than my fair share. Over time, I have come to realize that it is possible for a person to change. I believe this because I have changed.
When I was a young mother, and because of my perfectionistic tendencies, I read and thought through many parenting approaches. At the time, I believed an authoritarian parenting style was what I needed to embrace.
As I aged and was confronted by some of the fallout in my children’s lives from this style of parenting, I was heartbroken. I realized that I had not shown my flesh and blood the same grace that God had shown me over and over again.
I changed my mind, and that led to changes in my behavior that could be seen by others. I told my children I had been wrong to be so harsh with them at times and asked for their forgiveness.
I believe that real change – that we each have the ability to feel on the inside and others can see from the outside – begins by changing our mind. We have to be convinced from within that we were wrong, have a deep sorrow and ask God and those we have hurt to forgive us. I think that is what the Bible calls repentance.
At least, that’s how I see it.